Name: John McGivern Age: 48 Parish: Three Holy Women, Milwaukee Occupation: actor, writer, comedian, educator Book recently read: “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix,” by J.K. Rowling Favorite movie: Any Jack Lemon movie from the 1960s Favorite quotation: “The great man is one who never loses his child’s heart.” Mencius (Catholic Herald photo by Sam Lucero)

July 31, 2003

He’s Milwaukee’s own celebrity — and you can find him just about anywhere. Tune into the morning show with Carole and Dave on WKLH-radio, flip on Daybreak on WTMJ-TV Channel 4 where he provides on location bits around town, head to the Marcus Theater, Milwaukee where he’s starring in the comedy, “Fully Committed,” enroll in the University of Wisconsin — Milwaukee class, “Telling Tales,” where he’s the instructor. He’s a recognizable face to many, including fans strolling by a Third Ward sidewalk cafe, who interrupted a recent morning interview with the Catholic Herald to praise his efforts on stage.

After years living elsewhere, including Chicago, California and Florida, John McGivern returned about three years ago to embrace his hometown community with a vengeance. From radio to television to benefits for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and a Catholic elementary school, to magazine features, McGivern is a familiar face and voice around town.

And there’s another place locally where McGivern appears regularly: at Mass at Three Holy Women Parish, Milwaukee, where he’s a parishioner.

It’s easy to draw parallels between McGivern’s return to his Milwaukee roots and his return to the faith of his youth. In both cases, McGivern stayed away long enough to appreciate what he was missing.

McGivern, one of six children in an Irish-Catholic family who lived on Milwaukee’s East Side, graduated from SS. Peter and Paul Grade School, Milwaukee in the late 1960s and enrolled at St. Lawrence Seminary, Mt. Calvary with plans to become a priest.

He said the call to religious life came early. While his brothers and friends would play football or baseball, McGivern said he’d cut bread for hosts as he was playing priest. Entering the seminary was a natural decision, he said, recalling encouragement he received from his parents, teachers and priests.

Although McGivern graduated from St. Lawrence Seminary and took simple vows as a Franciscan, at age 24, he realized the priesthood was not his calling.

“My leaving was based on the thought that maybe there’s something else out there for me. (Seminary life) was all I ever knew, all I ever experienced,” said McGivern, adding that his leaving also had much to do with his coming to grips with his homosexual feelings. “I wasn’t sure I could commit to the celibate life,” he said.

McGivern is gay, a fact he’s open about in his performances. Yet, he stressed, he does not want to be “a poster boy” for any particular cause.

While he openly addresses his homosexuality, McGivern admitted it took him years to come to grips with it himself. “I’ll be the first one to say this is not a choice and it’s nothing I’d even be if I had a choice,” he said. “It’s spiritually difficult, socially difficult, culturally difficult,” he said.

Yet, he says it’s how he was made, and even through his humor, he wants people to hear his message of tolerance and acceptance.

After leaving the seminary, McGivern headed for Chicago to try his hand at acting, something he had dabbled in at St. Lawrence. Finding he had a knack for entertaining people, his career took off. But free from the rigidness of the seminary, McGivern, the self-described “good boy” turned to destructive behaviors. “I entered the seminary right out of eight grade. I was always a good student, good boy, a good seminarian ... after I left, I just went crazy. I went wild in all aspects of my life. I just thank the Lord, I lived through it.”

McGivern’s downward spiral included heavy cocaine and alcohol use to the point where his family thought drastic intervention was needed. His brother went to Chicago and brought him to Milwaukee where the concerned family gathered to confront him. He entered DePaul Rehabilitation Center and proudly notes that he’s been clean and sober for nearly 14 years, since Jan. 5, 1990.

Immediately after the seminary, McGivern abandoned his Catholicism, too, searching for “whatever else might be out there.” He tried the Episcopalian Church, the Lutheran Church and “even tried meditation, but I found I was too nervous for that.”

The Alcoholics Anonymous program is heavily based on faith, and McGivern said he found himself gravitating back to what was familiar, his Catholic faith.

Six or seven years ago, he returned to the Catholic faith, “where I guess all of the dogmas that were put into my head (were also attached) onto my heart. Once something’s in your heart, it’s on your soul,” he said.

McGivern moved from Chicago to Los Angeles, and after director Garry Marshall saw him perform in “Sheer Madness” offered him a role as a trolley driver in the 2001 Disney movie starring Julie Andrews, “Princess Diaries.”

Yet living in L.A. is not easy or inexpensive, said McGivern, explaining he wanted to return to Milwaukee to be closer to family. He purchased a downtown condo about three years ago, and between “Fully Committed,” radio and television bits, teaching, and commercials, he’s found more than enough to keep him busy for the seven to eight months of the year he calls Wisconsin home. During the remaining months, he performs around the country, including Tampa, Fla.

McGivern also found a home at Three Holy Women Parish, where he has high praise for pastor Fr. Tim Kitzke. “My relationship with the church now is about community and faith and celebrating together. Fr. Tim does an incredible job of celebrating that faith,” he said, adding he doesn’t feel excluded by fellow worshipers. “We have a congregation (at Three Holy Women) full of different ages, ethnic variations and diversity.” He noted that the church’s teaching on homosexuality “is not in my face every time I go to church.”

McGivern acknowledged he’s been criticized for being openly gay and a Catholic, since the church teaches that homosexual acts are contrary to natural law.

“The Catechism of the Catholic Church” also teaches that men and women with homosexual tendencies “must be accepted with respect, compassion and sensitivity.”

That’s a similar message that McGivern preaches in his performances, “The sooner we all can begin to realize that what we share, and what is similar is greater than what’s not, and the sooner we can all begin to embrace our similarities and truly begin to respect what’s different, that’s when things get easier.”

Recently McGivern found a way to give back to the faith community he finds so supportive. His one-man benefit show at Dominican High School last spring earned $16,000 for Catholic East Elementary School, the school which resulted from a merger of his alma mater.

While McGivern doesn’t deliver homilies weekly from a church pulpit, he’s comfortable in the knowledge that his performances are a way for him to share his message of tolerance and acceptance with a wide audience — similar to what he might have been doing as an ordained priest.